Yes, I made stirfry. I am cooking again, a little. It is Lent and I decided that if I was going to give up meat (as I try to do every year) I should cook more so I have more control over what I eat. It is pretty good too.
As I was cooking I thought about how little cooking I have done since I got divorced, then even less when the kids moved out. I have stopped doing a lot of things in my singleness...and I needed to change that. This weekend I kind of went on a shopping spree and bought painting supplies. No, not paint the bedroom supplies, but make a painting supplies. I have enjoyed the painting class I have been taking so decided to do some stuff at home. I need to start reveling in my singleness instead of letting it stop me from doing things just because I don't want to do them alone. So I own paints now. A whole set of 18 different colors of acrylic paints. And 6 paintbrushes. And 3 canvases. Small ones, I didn't want to waste money on the large ones if I decide I can't really paint after all. ;)
So here I go, delving into unknown territory. I haven't really had a hobby since I first got married, the military life, kids, school, work all took over. Now I get to get back to it. And I am excited. And a little nervous. Me, being the perfectionist that I am, doesn't want to mess it up. But I am learning that that is part of learning a new skill or doing something fun, there is no messing up.
So what did that have to do with stirfry? Well, I made fried rice, frozen in the microwave. When I took i tout of the microwave it looked horrible.....bland, no color, no flavor. So I got into the fridge and took out sprouts, broccoli, snap peas, and some soy sauce, dumped it all into the wok and cooked away. I took out the things I didn't like, the baby corn (well, I like those but they are bad for me) and the water chestnuts). So much better. I realized as I was doing that that I was settling for food that sucked, and I was settling for a life that sucked as well. No, my life really doesn't suck, it is pretty great, but not where I want it to be. So I am going to change it. I am going to paint. Paint life into my life.
I am in charge. I am in control. And if there is anything about my life I don't like, only I can change it. And I have already made huge strides. Being a Type 1 Diabetic, I have brought my A1C from 12 to 5.6.....in a year. That is huge! I got my own place.....very own, no one else on the lease, no roommates, all my own. I have been promoted three four times in six years, I bought my dream car (an older version of it, but still what I wanted) and I have made decisions about my life that I never thought I would make alone. I have made decisions about my faith, my life, my health, my finances, etc. All by my self! To be honest, there are not that many people who can say that. Most people consult someone on things...their partner/spouse, friends, parents, etc. I can say that most of my decisions have been made on my own. And for that I am very proud of how they have turned out.
Now, I know that I really didn't make the decisions all alone. I had experience I gained in my life from the opportunities I have had and the people who have influenced me. I have used research, experiences of others, and opinions of others to help shape the decisions I made, but in the end, I had final say.
I have come a long way, baby! LOL And more changes are afoot. During Lent, I have decided not only to add prayer to my life, but I am deleting little things each week that are not productive or good for me. Anything that does not bring me happiness is to be gone by Good Friday. Just like my stirfry tonight, I am going to add things I like and that are good for me, take out the stuff that I don't like or is bad for me, and redefine my life. I am looking forward to being renewed on Easter Sunday in my new life....with its challenges and problems and obstacles, but also with my renewed sense of direction, purpose, and blessings.
As I was cooking I thought about how little cooking I have done since I got divorced, then even less when the kids moved out. I have stopped doing a lot of things in my singleness...and I needed to change that. This weekend I kind of went on a shopping spree and bought painting supplies. No, not paint the bedroom supplies, but make a painting supplies. I have enjoyed the painting class I have been taking so decided to do some stuff at home. I need to start reveling in my singleness instead of letting it stop me from doing things just because I don't want to do them alone. So I own paints now. A whole set of 18 different colors of acrylic paints. And 6 paintbrushes. And 3 canvases. Small ones, I didn't want to waste money on the large ones if I decide I can't really paint after all. ;)
So here I go, delving into unknown territory. I haven't really had a hobby since I first got married, the military life, kids, school, work all took over. Now I get to get back to it. And I am excited. And a little nervous. Me, being the perfectionist that I am, doesn't want to mess it up. But I am learning that that is part of learning a new skill or doing something fun, there is no messing up.
So what did that have to do with stirfry? Well, I made fried rice, frozen in the microwave. When I took i tout of the microwave it looked horrible.....bland, no color, no flavor. So I got into the fridge and took out sprouts, broccoli, snap peas, and some soy sauce, dumped it all into the wok and cooked away. I took out the things I didn't like, the baby corn (well, I like those but they are bad for me) and the water chestnuts). So much better. I realized as I was doing that that I was settling for food that sucked, and I was settling for a life that sucked as well. No, my life really doesn't suck, it is pretty great, but not where I want it to be. So I am going to change it. I am going to paint. Paint life into my life.
I am in charge. I am in control. And if there is anything about my life I don't like, only I can change it. And I have already made huge strides. Being a Type 1 Diabetic, I have brought my A1C from 12 to 5.6.....in a year. That is huge! I got my own place.....very own, no one else on the lease, no roommates, all my own. I have been promoted three four times in six years, I bought my dream car (an older version of it, but still what I wanted) and I have made decisions about my life that I never thought I would make alone. I have made decisions about my faith, my life, my health, my finances, etc. All by my self! To be honest, there are not that many people who can say that. Most people consult someone on things...their partner/spouse, friends, parents, etc. I can say that most of my decisions have been made on my own. And for that I am very proud of how they have turned out.
Now, I know that I really didn't make the decisions all alone. I had experience I gained in my life from the opportunities I have had and the people who have influenced me. I have used research, experiences of others, and opinions of others to help shape the decisions I made, but in the end, I had final say.
I have come a long way, baby! LOL And more changes are afoot. During Lent, I have decided not only to add prayer to my life, but I am deleting little things each week that are not productive or good for me. Anything that does not bring me happiness is to be gone by Good Friday. Just like my stirfry tonight, I am going to add things I like and that are good for me, take out the stuff that I don't like or is bad for me, and redefine my life. I am looking forward to being renewed on Easter Sunday in my new life....with its challenges and problems and obstacles, but also with my renewed sense of direction, purpose, and blessings.